My daughter, Kaia, is 11 years old. The other day while walking by her room, I overheard her talking on the phone about one of the online games she plays. Kaia said something along the lines of “I’ll see you on Rooney, level twenty by the agility training area in the tree gnome stronghold.” Or something like that.
WTF? It’s not so much what was said as much as was the seriousness with which it was said.
There’s an entirely different language being used now by my kids and as my 40th birthday approaches, the reminders are everywhere and becoming more frequent. It’s quite possible the readers of MaiLife are a bit younger than I am. If that’s the case, good for you. It won’t last. At some point, there’s the highest likelihood you’ll be taking some interest in where the heck the agility training area in the tree gnome stronghold is when your kids are talking about it.
A couple years ago when Kaia started playing online games, I sat her down and had a serious conversation about things she needs to be aware of when being online. The obvious ones like “don’t chat with strangers” and “don’t tell people you meet online personal information about yourself” were part of that discussion. It certainly didn’t land on deaf ears either. Kaia seemed genuinely interested and attentive as I laid out these rules. Since she’s my oldest, it was my first experience to try and communicate that there are people online who don’t necessarily have her best interests in mind and that she should be careful.
Fast forward.
I wandered into her room to find her on the computer playing Runescape, a very popular online adventure game primarily aimed at younger kids. Both Kaia as well as my 9 year old, Ethan, love Runescape and they play it as often as they’re allowed to use the computer. I should really make mention of the positive impact this particular activity has had on their computer skills. Both kids have become very decent typists and are really comfortable using a computer. I’ve seen Ethan troubleshoot computer problems which my father couldn’t figure out with a Bill Gates brain transplant.
Anyway, Kaia was on Runescape when I walked in. She was chatting with some kid who was in Canada. Kaia told him she lived in New York City. Kaia’s screen name was a lot like “Rockin’ Beauty” (I’ll hold back from using her real screen name because I don’t trust the readers of this magazine, either). Kaia even went so far as to lie and tell this kid that she was visiting Canada next year. The whole thing just felt wrong.
“Why do you lie and tell him you live in New York?” I demanded, a bit unhappy with her skills in deception. “Why are you telling him all these untruths.”
“Well, you told me never to tell people online real information about myself!” she shot back. “The other stuff is just part of the experience.”
Gulp. Good point. She’s right.
I don’t really have a good idea how I’m supposed to manage my kids online but man, it must be tough for them at times to figure out what the hell their parents are talking about. The Internet is just proving to complicate things for us. On one hand, we want to encourage them to be honest with themselves and with others. To always tell the truth. On the other hand, we need to protect them against certain undesirable elements out there. Where those two hands meet can be a bit weird. In this particular case with Kaia, I walked out of her room deflated, unsure about the correct comeback. To basically get owned (or perhaps in this case, pwned) by an 11 year old, sucks.
Managing Ethan on the computer is a bit easier. He’s more obvious in his usage and is certainly not as clever in his colourful use of language as Kaia is. Nor does he have the capability make up such wild stories. He’s also a bit more oblivious as to any dangers as long as he can just have his fun. I watched him log on to his gaming profile on Runescape the other day. Unlike Kaia’s self-centered “Rockin’ Beauty” moniker, Ethan had the more mysterious and dare I say nerdy name of “8342214”.
“What’s up with that screen name, Ethan? How did you end up choosing that?” I asked.
“No real reason.” he said. “I couldn’t think of anything else.”
There’s an inferred logic inside the mind of my 9 year old which continues to fascinate me. More interesting was his password which he informed me was the word “apply”.
That’s pretty original, I thought. When I asked him how he came up with that security word, he told me that when he created his profile, the website told him to choose a password and then press “APPLY”. He couldn’t think of a word on his own and APPLY was staring him in the face so it seemed to be as good a choice as any. I give him high marks for working this out.
Kids rule.
From MaiLife, May 2008
